When Dreams Prevail,

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

It better to receive baluku then give baluku..

25th June 2008

It better to receive baluku then give baluku..

XD today seems a little slack back on my work.cant seems to reach my target 200 contacts.seeing those contacts almost give me nitemare these days...
but it was kinda funny that while i was listening to fm 98.7
i feel like doing a dedication for someone i know.

yea well everyone having being going through thick and thin times.
and yea so is she.but it's always nice to have someone bring a little smile into other's life.so yea i went to try my luck calling in XD
the first few tries was a failure T^T
but my last try shocked me xD
i got through =)but although i didnt manage to dedicate a song for that day,i was given a promise for a call back tmlaround 11+am =3
yea so i guess i should dedicate this to everyone in kuraidori as well^^
i wonder how can i record it down =\
o well =3 cant wait for tml xD why am i so excited anyway xD

went to meet a friend for dinner today,
"Shokudo!" is kinda a cool place to have jap food.
haha it's nice to eat as well as convers with someone in jap.
it's so hard to find someone who can kinda convers in jap.though my jap is not that good,
excluding the fact that whenever i talk too fast i jumble up my words(same for any language >.<)but yea i guess tonite is a enriching nite .

cheese cake hunting is so hard at times haha.especially when time is not within your control.haha most of the shops were close by the time we reach "malina square" XD so we wondered around and around ,unknowingly ending up at suntec. Had 1 last game of DDR before the arcade closes.haiz long time never play DDR my skill very jia lat
-.-" dance until like ah toot
not to mention the dance pad scary>.<>
too use to Pump it up liao haha.maybe when i play a bit more in JE arcade then challenge again bah..

has been a fun nite..teasing around without worries it's as if the time has stopped for that few hours but i guess it's more like the other way around haha time pass faster when one is having fun. was kinda sad that the nite just ended like that

mochi-chan seichou seichou seichou!!okii Okii OKII!!
puchi hammer-chan pong pong pong!! itai Itai ITAI !!

quote of the nite:

"if u stack multiple balukus together,
u can form a pyramid ! XD"

11:55 PM

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

A Lance shot from far has eased my pain...

24th June 2008

A Lance shot from far has eased my pain...

a boring day at work...yea i am back to doing work alone.
but i guessi prefer it that way anyway.
at least i dont have to worry about making sure others are ok
which in the end made me slack -.-

went back to holic to chat with some old friends.
didnt know so many things had happened when i was gone for this past 1 month+
new ribbons are tied,old fireworks has fade away...
hmmm love is a mysterious thing do we all agree?
a moment of happiness can turn into a handful of pain in a blink of an eye...
i am glad i have made some friends which i can rely my probs to
it's good to have friends around often.

for good or bad times.Lance my gratitudes to u my friend.though i have only know u for a short period.but u made me feel as if i have been your friend since young.
sorry to say i sould still prefer ppl i can actually get close to.i might be able to chat online easily but i prefer to be able to see wat my partner is feeling and always be there at times of need.so no virtual love for me =)

but although friends are there to help ,there are others who are there to harm...
once again i can have almost heard another crying from someone close to me.
why cant somne ppl just be considerate over the others..
does making others feel hurt a way of comfort of others?
sadist? pervert? inconsiderate baboon?
there is no need to let the world feel that u are suffering...
to feel less pain,u must let the world feel joy as well...
but maybe i should try to be less caring to everyone ..
am i giving those i love insecurity just becos i am too caring to everyone?
i just wanted to see the world smile with me...
is that a hard thing to do?

i am already emptied of tears...
an empty capsule floating in this world of sorrow...
i just wish i can make those who feel sad happy
those who are arragant,humble
and those who tries to make use of others for their own advantages realise
how much they are being notice.not just by ppl around them but ever soul that lurks all over.

i have also understand one thing from a recent ordeal.
loving someone is not all about supporting them everything..
but to help them when they fall
so that they can learn to walk by themselves and notice the onewho helped them before.

again Lance thanks u have made me realised wat i once had in my heart but have shrowded by my peers..

Yuuka:
i know u wont be reading this but i just wanna say
life is never lost blue sea.
wat u have lost before does not mean u will lost it in the future
everything is stored in the heart.
i hope that one day u will walk out of the dark shadows
and see the light that someone is there to care for u as well

10:57 PM

Saturday, June 21, 2008

kimi tachi ga wakaranai desu..

20th June 2008

kimi tachi ga wakaranai desu..

friday passed briefly.
for so long days had passed all crazily slowly.
it's as if work has became a burden XD
upon seeing that loads of crap i cant help feeling frustrated =\
of cos there are other problems i am facing as well during that time.
but alls well for now haha.

i wanna be free~~~ unbinded by any pain or worries.~~

but today i have recieved a sms that kinda mad me a little sad...
8 young pup looking for masters,if they are not found in 2 days time...
they would have wings and join the tenshi in the heaven ...
upon seeing that i helped my friend spam for masters.
but yea not many ppl replied.
it was expected anyway >.<~
i do hope someone would adopt them T^T
sigh...if i still have Dabbie's number i would as k her if she wants one.
afterall her home is a house of pets XD

lastly i guess i wanna blog this for my personal reading next time...
to-chan...why must u always vent your angry on us everytime without any reason?
i dont wanna argue with u.i just wanna be left alone...i have to say u are a person who reacts to situation very quickly.that is something i really repect over u...but your random angry really drives me and oka-san crazy...

more over that day i was really depress as well...but u all wont know about that would u all?i hid everything behind my smile...was looking for someone to get a little confort,end up i got a reply that even made me more depress.i dont blame anyone after all it's my family prob...but everyone needs friends to just give a little light in their life as well.i seriously was kinda hurt by it..wanted to cry that day from all the stress..but some reason,i have already lost my tears years ago..i can only feel the pain inside but the tears will never come out anymore...

i wonder if that vow that i made about never to cry again a wise one...
although i will not show that side of me out anymore...
but it really hurts not being able to...
daremo watashi no kanashimi wo rikai desuka ?

6:47 AM

Friday, June 20, 2008

the courage to love is the courage to let go..

19th june 2008

the courage to love is the courage to let go..

days of agony and endless craving has finally ended
the feeling of liking someone and not having them,
yet having to battle against challenges that wont have any conclusions
had made me grew tired ,
i am a person who seeks for love
and treats it with outmost importance

but many a times i have to tell myself never to be too engross with it
loving someone is a very powerful thing
it take courage to stand up to someone,
talk to her,
and get to know her more.
but love is not a toy,
not something just to be played on and seek the winner out of the best
to guys yes winning is everything...
but to gals...they would feel very toyed around.
and that's something i totally dislike.

i am constantly seeking out ways to make the one i love smile
making them happy brings the smile in me as well

To someone and someone else: the reason why i didnt take up your challenge is not becos i am a coward...i think i told u before relationship is not a game.
i take it seriously

i dont want my partner to feel sad or even feel played out.treating someone with your heart and get to know them well if u like them...

desire can be a very painful thing.but dont ever choke someone.and be mindful about the ppl around u.hurting those beside them is as painful as hurting the one u love as well.selfishness will get you no where.

i am not stupid to have feel things running around.the emotions and else,know your heart..know the ppl around everyone as well..that's the truth power of love...

well this episode of my life has ended
i will be opening a new chapter again.

anata no shiawasen wo mamoteru
zetto..
zetto....

Something i did for my Cosplay club An L-O-L-er production =)

(if the link is laggy u can visit it at this link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a4N0dCu0qM0 )

7:39 AM

Thursday, June 19, 2008

learn to take things slowly.if not u may run out of breathe..

19th June 2008

learn to take things slowly.if not u may run out of breathe..

another sleepless nite for me...too much to think about,
suddenly i am drawing a blank within my own circle.
i feel out of place,something which i dont understand at all
i have i tried reflecting about my own doings.

but i seems to be blaming everything upon myself
i know inside wat is going on.
i dont wish to hid it
cos if i do,it's like feeding the green grunch and making him bigger

truth betold and nothing is worth a wealth of the world
if i can make u smile
cos that's a virtue that u have that makes u special.

ok i understand where i am standing now finally.
i have finally walk out of the dark tunnel
and found out wat is causing me to act this ackwardly.
i will change it.
it has always cos me a hack of a trouble
but i would improve myself,
until the day comes i would learn to be a better person then now.
i made u feel the warmth and smile once before
i would do it again and again
and make memories that lasts forever.

a promise to myself as well as a hidden promise to you
lastly my dear dreamer's world,my little tenshi sanctuary of mine
thank you for housing all the wonderful and sad thoughts that i have.
without you i think i would have been another wandering soul again...
i will do the right thing today =)

6:11 AM

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

The Flown away butterflies...

21th June 2008

The Flown away butterflies...

haha today was quite a fun day to have.
shaolin gal sure is a crazy show.
to think a chain in combo that becomes a dragon.omg XD
crazy.and ppl fighting on the water x.X

got own by mint also when we went to eat XD
lemon war XD

i mean wow she ate a lemon without any expression!!
i tried it i got owned totally

hmmm...my world suddenly goes on spinning somehow tonight
"Havesting a fruit from a blooming tree while it's still at it's early age
though it may sweet,
but it would have grown if it have has stayed on more."

sometimes i do wonder if i have always done something wrong that i cant seems to do send the correct msg over to the others.
yes i am noisy with friends
quiet when i am alone
shy and disorganized when i am with someone i love.
it's just a part of me that i cant seems to grasp.

i do understand to love someone is not about having them
deep inside i long for that,
of cos i wont wanna see someone hurt at even a little cause.
why?cos i was hurt before,even for a guy it's a scar and pain beyond anything
3 years...the pain lasted 3 years...
i drown myself in solitudation cos of it.
i fear to meet ppl,fear to seek another path
i hide my sad child behind my smiles longing for a hug
that child of mine wishes to seek a warmth to cry on.
but the father seeks no truth caged him within his dark prison...

sometimes...i wish i was born in another time...maybe later...
if that would have havent i would be living in a family who would understand my feeling

and let me explore that part of me and taste the sweetness of being hugged...

私の心を心待ちにする
しかし、私の魂の言葉を理解して
ご希望の目標を達成するために
あなたの幸せとの願いを
私は希望して再びチャンスが来る
として私を辛抱強く待つ
私の手を待ってあなたを保持する
すべてのあこがれをあなたと私の心...
しかし、必要なときに悲しく
わたしはあなたに暖かさを与える
私は常にあなたの守護天使...

12:34 AM

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

A Pain for a Fame...

17th June 2008

A Pain for a Fame...

these few days has really been a pain for me.
i am not sure why i am so moody these days.
day after day i am see ppl trying to hurt one another,one wat to another...
first the flaming of some irresponsible person.is it all due to the immaturity of these ppl that has cause a certain crumbling effect upon the younger gens..
in return of IQ u give up EQ...nvm i had gave that flaming bird a piece of my mind already but now yet another issue arised..and wat's more it's within the club

i dont wish to state names or wat so ever.everything i have here is purely my feelings over the issue.those who had saw my "essay" in the tread would know somehow how i feel.when i start writing something that long it would mean something big or emotional had happened.sometimes i do wonder why would one wanna go to a extend as to see pain in others?
is it a enjoyment to see someone suffer? "U" should know wat is happening.i might be a noisy person but in a corner i am always watching wat the world is moving.personally i dont really like arguing or quarrel unless other wise,if "U" love
having the attitude as of how the ppl in a certain community has.pls do join them in their world.from the last chat on that "flaming community" u seems pretty protective
over them.trying to learn to be like a burning flame?pls..if u do i am very much happy NOT to see u.be mindful of your worlds when u are talking.and remember this .u are not living in a world where only u exist.we all co-exist together,if u love being a loner and refuse so much as to try to hurt anyone i would not hold back as well.
just be mindful,i dontwise to see another devil-wanna-be.even if u are a fallen angel,u will not be forgiven if u dont.especially u have made a sunflower that i am planting looking all down and sad,that is something i totally dont give face -"-
i say it once i will say it again...

"Existance is not about letting ppl see who u are,it's how to make others see themselves that shows your existances
When A heart is bonded to another soul,Your body would bleed as the other is bruised as well"

so pls be considerate about the others whose around u before trying to start another
senseless blabber...

8:35 AM

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Lolita Photoshoot,the Purr and the Grinns...

14th june 2008

Lolita Photoshoot,the Purr and the Grinns...

haha yea u know it =) today is the day of the photo shoot.haha quite an experience for me.with the help of the models and other pro-photographers i was able to learn to take shots with are good.i am glad all the models are feeling relax and not all tense up.that's kinda important =D.no photoshoot is good if one feel all tense up.laughter and being natural is always the best way to start a photo session.useless we are in for some serious photo taking.(business wise XD)

i didnt expect the session to really be that long ,as i did a onsite survey of the places of good shots xD
i am still feeling a little sad that we can move on to japanese garden.
the shots there would really turn out great.
haha o well there will always be next time =)
looking forward to improving my shots more

gotta say thanks to ning for this great outing ^^
and gotta love your uncle's skills x.X
although he hinted me only a few tips but they are they cores ~ XD

but seriously i am glad everyone had fun .i was able to get quite a few close up shots to start of my portfolio for my hobby.take portrait is never a easy thing x.X
even a novice can do it if u having planning and research before any photoshoot
but really i was hoping to see the other photographers asking for poses.i guess maybe they are shy or tired XD

x.X really tired today
even now while i type this blog i kept dozing off XD
lol i donno how i am gonna survive tml's IPPT >.<" oo yea i just remembered we went over to chinatown today to take a look at the cosplay there . really Chinatown mode leh...cos piak sia! xD seeing all the ppl all over the place haha, but wat got us jumping is the timing 1pm~1.30pm cosplay dress LOL i see le also sian wahaha lol how to dress up and cosplay at so short timing. haiz dint manage to book the chalet today cos forget to get from cheese the member card.so i guess have to book online le haha . man...i doze off again.haiz i think i better go sleep liao too tired. haha came back reedit cos i was rushing in the morning for ippt o i cant upload some pic.

Best Pick of Duet

The Reason why i chose this is due to how
the both of the models smile in the pic
A Sense of harmony between both of them
Giving a feeling of the princesses in
the palace.
the contrast of both the colours
gives of a soft warm touch to the whole picture.

Best of Photoshoot pics

12:13 AM

Thursday, June 12, 2008

lol funny upon reading back my blog...

12th june 2008

lol funny upon reading back my blog...

hmm i cant believe i fell asleep while blogging last nite XD
upon reading wat i write i saw a long trail of "ssssssss"
wat's more funny is that i wanted to say something in mind end up
all i see are half typed ones wahaha
"wat the fiak!" XD

sad i just received a email from loyang resort telling me weekend are all fully booked>.<
haiz even the neighbouring resort all also book le...sat is a hot day for events and stuff.i am just hoping that ning's father is able to get for us the booking for the 3days x.X
but i have my doubts for it >.<
but at least tonite we settled for plan B in case we fail to get plan A
kinda sad that we had to move house all over =/
o well as long as everyone is happy that's all it matters haha.

haha suddenly remembered something i wanna blog xD
a big big sigh....i went over to cine hoping to get my hands on another 2 box of lucky star figurine but end up they ran out of stock !~~ >.<~
i do hope they have new stock if not i will never get a chance to get my lucky star le T^T

"The heart that holds the truth is one
which is more precious than the jewels of the world,
for the pure affection never cease to stop there when the clocks starts ticking..."

7:48 PM

11th June 2008

An Unlucky and Crumblesome day...

today have been one of the most mess one days of my life...haiz...sorry if it bothers u my friends but i really gotta say my heart out.if not i would feel really depress.today was suppose to be a working day for me.and yea the usual wake up brush teeth and stuff.but wat was most unlucky was that,of everyone in the family this faithful morning.everyone encounter no prob with the water pipe.and i of all ppl didnt even get anywhere near that damn thing.it exploded on me just as i was taking my morning shower.can u imagine soaping yourself halfway when that happens?
it's disasterous .i was in the state of panic...

calling over to my parents whe were having breakfast downstairs was nothing buta frantic screaming of "flooding Flooding!!!"
in my mind all i wanted to say was pls come back quick i need help i cant turn off the main water pipeline...my father came back and kinda screwed me upside down.that was kinda pissing me off...i mean hey i didnt do anything wrong.why am i being scolded?

ending up i had to take a day off from work...a waste of my time...i could have enough a lump sum again this month but i guess it would be after today ...

are females really hard to understand?hmmm i guess lots of guys would ponder over this question and trip into the bottomless pit.yes there is a certain complexity in the way they think as well as usmguys reacting to them.but truth be told,in the line of the love train,no one is ever riding on a bumpless roadsssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

12:59 AM

Monday, June 09, 2008

another "L"ol-ers outing

8th June 2008

another "L"ol-ers outing

another fun day has pass without abit of laughter wasted at all x.X
the day just gets more and more amusing.haha ok maybe i should light up the first candle in order to have t he room lighted =)

practically i was pretty excited of the outing as well as a certain event that was gonna start even before it.
something that i have planned way before the event.it actually took me quite a while to really have the gut to walk right in the boutique.initally i was planning on getting a set number of roses which norammly adds up to a certain meaning in it.
yea it's the traditional 6 stalk or 9 stalk meanings.but hmmm well one things was the arragement was not really to my liking till they offers me something better.wat they recommended was a bouquet of roses in form of a shape.and yea it's nice haha.anyway in my planning the rose was the big surprise but there was something even before the rose that would show sincereity.well i do believe in doing something from the heart rather then using money to buy something for someone.with money u can even buy the world so yea nothing much.so in order to make the it more discreed i went into a art and craft mode and made some roses instead.13 was the initally plan and yea i did folded 13 of them.why 13?it's has a meaning of it's own =)

but as i put the roses together it kinda got clusted =\ ending me to have a change of numbers to 9 instead.i would have chose 6 or 13 they both have the same meaning in it.13 was too clusted ,6 was too little >.<".but at least it turn out being ok(except that i cant find any green leaf like tape x.X)

but alls wells ends well.i got that day going with someone smiling and looking more gorious.oh my...that sure fills up a page worth of personal thoughts to remember o.O"

anyway back to the main topic
cant sleep last nite,was so busy thinking about a good way to start a surprise in the morning till i cant seems to fall asleep at all.chatted with harux till 6am+ before going for a short nap (finally...lol)

started off my journey at 10 and reached around 10.40am+.i was kinda shock on how big the bouquet was x.X and yea from there on the blushing never stop till i reach hougang lol.i have caught everyone's attention over my red roses,was so shy out that i had to find a corner away from the crowd x.X.but was make me heel a little annoyed was when i was making my journey to hougang ,the mrt security(in train personal) keep looking at me and my roses in a queer way -.-" yes i look all nervous and kepp looking around to see if i have reached.but i am NOT a terrorist -.- zzz
i dont have a bomb in my roses >.>

anyway after i reached there,i am face with another prob lol.it's 11.30! x.X
i was suppose to meet them al 12.30 x.X
lol i was really "LOL-ing" my way .didnt ate in the morning xD and was hoping to maybe grab a bite but i was so shy out that i went to the arcade in the mall to hid and kill time x.X.

time pass slow when u are planning for something x.X
but yes =) i did =) daiseiko desu~ all was still within the original plan i had set out to be.haha but i am still wondering how was she feeling when she actually opening up her eyes and saw that stalk of roses =)
a little mystery for me to ponder i guess.
oh my -.- there i go wandering off topic into my tots again

we met up with Dark to make our way to the meeting point in city hall
XD wat's funny was we as the organizers were later then the others XD
kinda funny,suddenly became VIP =3

haha anyway so much for morning details
i think was's fun would be when we are at the conventional hall
everyone was all suit up and ready to cosplay.
i sould have run around more as a photographer that day then being failed-L T^T
(zzz and i finally know why my cam is so wavy over the pics -.- shutter timer is longer when i am on "off-flash" mode )

spending our time chatting and posing away.i think the best one would be "the death of saori" theme XD
i will show the pic later when i upload them =D

after the event we all gather to make our way to haru and guess wat? we actually met the SGclub ppl going for cosplaying XD
lol stuck in the middle of city link chatting away.haha i can still remember a auntie came up to me and asked wat happen here xD.haha nah we are just having a event in suntec is all i can say XD.

after we made our way toi haru.it's all about teasing ice princess le our very own sensei =D
"ichi ...ni ...san...sensei!!!"
haha it was quite fun everyone was sitting outside haru waiting for us to finish off with the measurement before going together to ajisen (taka) for our dinner =3

lol but it wasnt that nice when ajisen was full nevertheless we made our way to ajiten instead XD.and yes yes we owned the place from their splited sits we end up having them rearrange the place to suit all 12 of us XD.
joke s and laughter never cease to go go off =x.u can never feel bored if u are going out with the LOL-ers =D.the only thing u need to fear is the lack of liang tehs... X3

kuraidori tomotachi mo ganbattemasu XD

"the funeral of Saori"

our stars of the show kuchikuchi and noriko

6:24 AM